My mother and I drove my Grandmother Lillywhite to my home two days ago. Everything is smooth and I feel that this is the right place for Grandmother right now. She has been living with my mom for the past eighteen months. My parents have opened their home to her...literally. Grandma has been living in the front family room. I think that situation has been difficult for everyone involved. My parents, who are now grandparents to over forty children, could no longer entertain their little ones in the family room with comfortable couches, bookshelves and toy closets. Instead, they had covered their carpet with linoleum to be wheelchair wheelable and made various other adjustments to their main floor bathroom and entryway. For Grandma, I think has been difficult as well. I think she couldn't help but feeling like her bedroom in the main floor family room was symbolic of the imposition in my parents life. With the combination of my parent's children and grandchildren scattered across the United States, a desire to serve a mission for their church, and my dad's recent retirement from the university, the necessary care required by my grandmother limited their flexibility to travel and enjoy this period of life together. Although my mother was so happy to have an opportunity to be close to her mother and serve her, I believe my grandmother could feel like her presence restricted my mother and father.
About two months, I had a strong impression that it was time for me to take my turn taking care of my grandmother. I have always felt close to her. She allowed me and Charlie to come live with her during my last semester at law school in Provo. I am at a place in my life, newly married with one eight year old son and a seven-month old daughter, that Grandma's care would not interfere with my everyday life. I don't like to go out much because I feel badly for little Gwen in the carseat and we don't have a lot of expendable money. Moreover, I have felt for some time now that with so few children at home, now is the time for me to be contributing to the family income. Although I am open to working outside the home, if necessary, it is not my first choice. I am sure there is some way to find a way to work from home doing attorney contract work, I have discovered that trying to produce something that requires my brain in the midst of taking care of people is extremely aggravating for me emotionally and mentally. Having Grandma here allows me to care for people...solely. That is my responsibility. What a joy! I love it! I am so blessed to have this experience.
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